Friday, June 1, 2018


For over a week my routine as been out of wack.  Without the AC, I've not wanted to do anything that will generate heat: laundry, cooking.  Or anything that will make me sweat too much, like cleaning.  We're struggling with keeping the house dehumidified (lest my allergies go nuts!) and keeping the cats from melting.  I've woken up with a headache almost every day this week.

I'm out of sorts, and feeling rather sad, anxious and just plain off.

There's now an end in sight.  They'll be here on Monday to fix the AC (sooner if there's a cancellation today).

I just have to get through three more days.  Then maybe I'll be able to get back to normal.  And I'll be able to cook... and do wash.  And not watch the cats melt and the dog pant.

And when I get back to a routine, maybe it can help pull me out of this funk.

Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Worst. Long. Weekend. Ever.

Remember in 2016 when our AC went out?  Well, it happened again.  Exact same symptoms.  The inside unit is working, but the fan in the outside unit isn't a-spinnin'.  We noticed it on Wednesday of last week.  Told the landlord right away.  Friday they called... the earliest their usual repair people can come is in 2 weeks.

2 weeks????  We're on a waiting list for the next available appointment, and he'll call around to see if someone can get here sooner.

Thankfully the weather wasn't in the triple digits like it was the last time this happened. So it's been livable.   The only issue I really have is how INCREDIBLY humid it is inside.  We're emptying out dehumidifier twice a day!

We spent the weekend monitoring the pets.  The dog was super pant-y and one of the cats melted.

Friday night the portable AC unit in the bedroom stopped working, leaving me with 2 hours of sleep before my Saturday morning race. 

Thankfully, Target had another unit.  It was bought online and I picked it up afterwords.  Cue a blessed nap!

After my very cold post-race shower and a nap, I sent the Spousal Equivalent to Viking Burger for lunch.  he came back with everything but my fries. 

Monday I went to order breakfast on the SE's app, and forgot to put it in the cart....

And today, driving into work, I found myself with the tire pressure light on.

Can I have a do-over?

How was your weekend?

Saturday, May 12, 2018

Anxiety Lies

I went out last night to a semi-required event with an organization that I'm a member of.  I was already exhausted, and I didn't know a great deal of the people at said event very well.  I spent the night thinking about all the crap that needed to be done at home and at work (even if I didn't want to).

By the time we left (early, might I add) I had declared that I was leaving that group and I didn't even know why I was there in the first place.

It is rather true that my own personal clock is very little like most everyone I know.  While many of my friends want to party until dawn, I'm almost always home and in bed by 10, never go out on a Friday night, and am up most mornings between 5 and 6.  And the fact that I'm up EXERCISING between 5 and 6 blows their minds!

I'm not like other people, and I know that.  I have no kids.  I don't like going out drinking or dancing.  My house is decorated in Geek-Chic.  I can have long, in depth conversation about Disney, Marvel Movies and RuPaul's Drag Race, but not sports or most of the TV shows that people watch.  Hell, I cna talk Geek and throw in parallels to history and classic literature.  (Black Panther.... totally based on Hamlet.)

I also have the memory of a goldfish, and have anxiety issues that prevent me from going out and being social at times (the bigger the group, or the more people that I don't know.. the worse it gets)

The awful part of this is:  If I just got over myself I'd have a good time.  The awful feeling that no one likes me is a lie.

And I think my main reason for joining certain organizations that I have attempted to join.  If I'm a member, then I'll KNOW that they like me.  (Even if the nights at bars cause panic attacks or the thought of volunteering makes me want to hide)

Maybe I need to re-evaluate things.  maybe I need to call my BFF more and schedule time together.  Maybe I need to realize that my friends are as geeky as me and totally unashamed about it.

It's just the anxiety lying. 

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

It's that time of year again....

It's the same.  Every year the weeks before Commencement are full of deadlines, and to do lists.  And the weeks after are full of financial matters.

And it's mentally exhausting.

I have absolutely no concept of time.  Almost every week for the last month I've declared how excited I was that Friday was tomorrow.... only to be told that today is Tuesday.  But those two days had so much going on that it felt like four days.

My brain is so stuffed with things to do, remember and figure out that I'm walking into rooms with no idea why I'm even there.

And let's not mention the fast that I was half way to work when I remembered that I didn't have make up on.  Let's all be glad that I didn't forget things like pants or a bra.  I'm even having dreams about doing things, then realizing that I've not actually remembered to do them in the real world

And every night I go home and try to do the thinking thing, and end up like this:

So if I look like a zombie when you see me next, I should be better in a few weeks!

Friday, April 20, 2018

Spring Cleaning Tip: Burn your house down

I generally have 2 ways I approach housework:

1.) Ignore it

2.) Get disgusted and hit crisis mode.

I tried to pet the cat today and couldn't get to her through the piles of stuff on the floor.

Today marks the beginning of Crisis Mode 2018!

Sadly, it puts a MAJOR crimp in my weekend plans.

I have a 5K on Saturday, an OrangeTheory Class on Sunday, and in between those I was going to go to RavenCon.  I might still hit the con, but not as much as I was planning.

Instead, I'll be cleaning my kitchen and bathrooms.  I'll be taking all the crap on our stairs upstairs and putting it away.  I'll be weeding out the rack with my handbags on it and putting shoes where they belong.  I'm going to vacuum the downstairs, do laundry and go grocery shopping.

And you know what?  If I have done a little of that every day for the last month I might not be giving up my weekend to clean all the things.
Maybe I should actually DO the chores that I assign myself every day!  You think?

Monday, April 2, 2018

"Did Judas Iscariot have God on his side?"

I posted this as the live broadcast started last night.  Now, let me be clear.  We didn't just go see the show.  Music class for the month before we set foot in the theater was spent listening to the concept album, with printed lyric sheets in our hands.  We them went as a class to University Hill and the converted Synagogue that was the Salt City Center for the Performing Arts where they had been performing this show every year since the early 80's.  And I was hooked.

I think I went up to that dilapidated building (I hear the place was shut down a few years ago) once a year for the next decade to see Jesus Christ Superstar.

At one time I owned four or five different cast recordings.

I committed the show to memory some time in the late 90's.

I'm a fan.

So when I saw that they were doing a live production, I was both elated and worried.

But as the camera panned over the set, my fears were put to rest.

Jesus Christ Superstar started out life as a concept album, which is why it's a sung through musical.  It's also an interesting take on the story.  (Seriously do I need a spoiler warning?  It's from the bible!)

In an interview with Andrew Lloyd Webber he said that the idea came from a line form a Bob Dylan song.  "Did Judas Iscariot have God on his side?"  The story is seen through the eyes of Judas.  So have an excellent is critical.  Thankfully, they did... as my tweets attest to:

The whole idea is that Judas was Jesus's right hand man.  To quote an article from Esquire:
Jesus Christ Superstar begins, in fact, with a wallop of a song in "Heaven on Their Minds." It's the song in which Judas lays it all out: his fears that Jesus' followers are blinded by his celebrity, the enemies who are zeroing in on him and his disciples, and the worry that his teachings and sermons are too easily manipulated for others' political gain. It sets up the central conflict of the story, but it shows the meaning behind Judas' betrayal—one rooted in his humanity rather than pure villainy. (It's heavy, but take it from me: It's also a banger at karaoke.)
It's at the end of his life that he realizes he's just a pawn in God's plan.  And that's a TOUGH role.

Now, on to my thoughts:

The good!

  • Brandon Victor Dixon is a Tony Award winner and AMAZING!!  He acted the sh*t out of the role.  (Thought the actual death wasn't awesome... but that has GOT to be hard to stage)

  • The set was incredible.  And I LOVED the updating to a more modern time.  (Anyone else catch that the crown of thorns was barbed wire?)
I mean, come on!  this was amazing!
  • I loved how the musicians were involved.  The show opened with a guitar and a string quartet!
The bad:

  • John Legend is good.. but his acting wasn't up to the challenge.
  • The priests outfits.... Were they in the temple of Krypton?
  • The sound mixing was off.  I hope they can release a video with better sound mixing.

My conclusion:

I was in tears for most of the show, overwhelmed by how well the show that I love was lovingly put on.  Seriously.  If they play it again, go watch it.

Monday, March 12, 2018

A Wrinkle in Time

Saturday I sat in a theater breathless with excitement to see one of my favorite books of all time on the screen.

I left, liking it.  but not loving it.

I didn't have an issue with the fact that they updated the story.  I didn't mind the multiracial cast.  I loved the visuals.  And for the most part, I loved the casting.  But for now, let me say that here, there be spoilers:
What I loved:

  • The casting was wonderful.  I LOVED the Mrs.'s characters!  (Though I had a bit of an issue with Mrs. Whatsit's introduction, but I'm willing to overlook it)
  • Updating it for now.  The book is form 1962.  A LOT has changed.  They changed the setting.  And I'm OK with it.
  • The visuals were even better than I had imagined!!

Where it went wrong for me:
  • Camazotz-  Seriously.  From the beginning to the end, I didn't like it.  
    • The kids are prepared for the battle before they go, it's not an accident.
    • Camazotz isn't an illusion.  It's insidiousness is the sameness.  Everything had a rhythm and a perfection.  Like the people didn't have to think for themselves. That's how the evil spreads- because it's easier not to think for yourselves than to critically think.
    • And what's with this wall nonsense????
  • Charles Wallace and Calvin O'Keefe
    • Their characters were changed in such a way that they were almost not even needed for this movie.  Seriously.  What the writer did to these two is almost criminal.
    • Charles Wallace willing submits to The It in order to find their father.  He goes in knowing that the other two can pull him out.  In the movie the kid folds like a card table.  
    • Calvin... Oh Calvin... He was there because he's intuitive and can read minds like Charles Wallace.  He is the diplomat and talks his way into and out of things.  Movie Calvin.  Like why was he there????
Should you see the movie?  Of course!  There IS a powerful message there.  And I think all young ladies should see it.

I just wish it had the complexities of the book!