Friday, September 30, 2011

Because I had to explain it last night....

I get to choir last night and remarked: "sorry I wasn't here last week. I didn't have enough spoons." I got a few looks, so I had to explain.

I thought about it after, and where most people who have physical issues get a daily spoon allowance.. I think I get a weekly one.

Here's how it goes for me: I get a weekly spoon allowance on Mondays. Most weeks, things are great and the spoons last until Sunday. Some weeks I'm running very low by the weekend.

Some weeks I've gone into spoon-debt and had to borrow some from the next week's allowance. Those weeks never end well. Those are the weeks where I spend the weekend at home.

But it can, and has, gotten worse. There was a couple weeks over the summer where I was so far into spoon-debt that I simply couldn't borrow any more. This meant that I couldn't keep the Social Anxiety at bay any longer. I was unable to order fast food... because it required talking to another person.

After that weekend, I have learned to listen and trust in myself. I've also learned to look ahead. If I have a jam packed week coming up, I take it a bit easy the week before.

And if y'all made it through all of that.. thank you!

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